Friday Letters

Dear Scandal, You did not disappointment last night!  I had my doubts since I never thought Shonda Rhimes could top the winter finale… but I was wrong wrong wrong.  I mean she’s kept Grey’s going this long – why would I think she’d lose a gem like Scandal… That Olivia Pope with her dramatic lip quiver.  Idk if that will ever get old.

Dear ATM, so I can deposit money into you?  You can also deposit checks if I sign them?  I am so not 2014…  oh and it blows my mind when people take photos of checks w their phones and deposit them… whaaa???

Dear Casino, I’ll be seeing you tomorrow… but no bingo or gambling for this lady… just VIP club dancing bachelorette party FUN!

Dear Smellen, thanks for the shoes!!  It’s the best to have a sister with the same shoe size as you!!!

Dear Candy Crush, STILL goin strong!!

Dear NF, so Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday you decided to cling to your bed screaming NIGHT NIGHTTTTTT when we tried to leave the house in the morning!!! but Tuesday and Friday you were an angel.  What’s that about?  I can’t deal with your inconsistent behavior.. let’s just be an angel Mon-Fri.  Thank you!

Dear Cher, You can wear whatever outfit you want because you’re fabulous for LIFE.

Dear Hillary Clinton, I love how you made the softball jab at the woman who threw the shoe at you!

Friday Letters

Dear Candy Crush, Level 273… I just can’t quit you.

Dear NF, your obsession with Despicable Me… starting to get to me…. “dare-a-me!” (how you say Despicable Me… which kind of sounds like Jeremy with a D)… you will shout this until I put the DVD (you call it a DDD)… and I just don’t know how much Despicable Me I can take?

 Dear Smellen, NF has been asking about you.  Our 4 day trip to Vermont last weekend has got him used to you being around all the time.  Sooo he should probbbably see you this weekend.  I know you read this!!!  So get at me sista!

Dear Kris and Bruce Jenner, I am always and always will be rooting for you!!  So these rumors that you’re back together or never even were apart, make me happy.

Dear Snooki, congrats on having another baby!!  Can I just say that I hope it’s a girl… and I hope that Jwoww’s baby girl and your baby girl are bffs in matching animal print outfits!  Please!!

Dear Parenthood (the show on NBC), you are a really really good show and I love how you are portraying real life situations that I can either relate to or open my mind to.  I laugh and I cry every episode.

Dear DWTS, Why are you changing the partners?  Am I going to like this?  Or is it going to stress me out?

Dear April, so far you’ve been good… let’s just not rain a ton please.

Dear Easter Bunny, see you Sunday!!!

What I’m Loving Wednesday

 

 

NF: my adorable little boy.  I’m loving him always.

Candy Crush: STILL addicted.  Still.

 

Juan Pablo: is he like the best bachelor they’ve ever had?  At first when they said they picked him I was surprised… I don’t know why… he’s amazing.

 

Teen Mom 2: the new season of Teen Mom 2.  I cry every episode I just can’t help it!  I became pregnant with my child at 24 with someone I just started dating, and I am still with him today.  If we were 16 I know it would have been 100 times harder so I just feel so much for them and the babies who are all about to be 4 years old!

Taylor Swift’s arms: they are like not even real life.  I can’t stop staring at them.  They are just so incredibly thin.

 

 

Friday Letters

Dear NF, You officially say “no” now.  It’s actually pretty shocking that you’ve waited this long to add that word to your vocabulary.  So far you use it in adorable ways… like when I change the channels, no, no, no, no like you’re saying next, next, oh not that channel next, next.  I’m fine with that… it’s when you start adding it to the “MINE!  MY PHONE!” it’ll get old quickly.  No, it is not your phone, you are 2, I didn’t have a phone until I was 18 years old… and I don’t think you should either… but you probably will because we won’t have land lines – and if you’re home alone, I’ll want you to have a phone…. but maybe you can call me from your ipad (will ipads still be a thing?) or something on skype… who knows what’ll happen 10 or 15 years from now… your older cousins got ipads and kindles for Christmas this year and they are 6 and 11… like seriously?  is that normal these days?  If you’re 6 you should get a bike and dolls right?  Not a kindle… I have a kindle… it was a big deal for ME to have a kindle… sorry this letter has turned into a rant about Christmas presents.  In all honesty I wish my parents bought me a Nintendo which is probably the equivalent of getting a kindle these days.  And they never did… but I turned out okay… right?  Oh and I love that you say coffeeee ALL the time.

Dear C, Thank you so kindly for taking care of me yesterday.  I did however yell your name about 15 times from the bedroom like Kate Winslet did in Titanic to Leonardo DiCaprio a the end with zero voice left “JACK…Jack…jack…come back..jack..jackk…jacckkk….jack” (insert C’s name).  You finally came in and by that time I was so dramatic and pathetic that I just sobbed… and instead of telling me to get my ish together you did the exact correct thing!  You picked up NF and you picked up 4 cans of chicken noodle soup and made me some.  Thank you thank you thank you.

Dear Target, I HATE TO LOVE YOU.  Seriously.  WTFFFFFFFFF.  I got targeted.  That’s what we’re calling it didja know?  My info got OUT and I was a victim of identity theft.  Do I know it was because I shopped at Target, no… but I did… and it happened… so I can assume right?  It happened to my sister’s boyfriend who shopped at Target then too.  How many people has this really happened to?  Because you think, oh no it won’t happen to me.  I don’t even win GIVEAWAYS ever… what are the chances it’ll happen to me.  WELL IT DID TARGET… and I did receive 3 gift cards to your store for Christmas and I’ve used almost all of them… so there’s my loyalty toward you.  I can never stay away.  But seriously though is there some law suit I can jump on and get $20 in like two years from all this?  Sorry Target… you really blew it… I’ll still shop there… but man… that really sucks for you.

Dear Smellen, OMGGGGGGGGGGGG you got me riding boots for Christmas… I’ve been searching for a pair for two years… and I couldn’t find one… and bam.. you just buy me a pair in 6 1/2 and done and done.  Love love love love love love love them.

Dear new gray tall ugg boots, yeah yeah yeah maybe you are for college girls… but you are like walking on WARM CLOUDS!!  I love you.

Dear Book Club, yes the book was long… yes the book was boring… yes the book was long (again I know).  But more than just TWO people need to complete the book!  We’ll pick a simpler book for this month.

Dear Orange is the New Black, It took me 5 days to complete the whole 1st season…. WHYYYYYYY isn’t the second season not coming out until the Spring… is that just a rumor?  Could it be sooner?  Please you’re an amazing show… why did I wait so long to watch you?

Dear Candy Crush, I thought I dumped you… Why am I playing… PS Im on level 186… is that good?

Dear storm Hercules, pshhh this is NOTHING.  Yes it’s cold… but the last time it was this cold I can remember it… yeah it was 2004 and I was a senior in high school… but THEN THE NEWS SAID, the last time it was this cold was a decade ago and my head exploded.  WHAT… what did you say weatha man??  A decade ago… that can’t be right… ahhh 2004 was a decade ago?!  what what whatttt.

Dear Scandal, I have to say… I really can’t wait for you to be back on next week!

Dear Pretty Little Liars, it’s been what… like FOREVERRRR and you finally start back up next week… I just don’t know if I can do it… I need some REAL answers… this show has gone on for far too long.  Who am I kidding… I’ll watch just to see what the girls are wearing.

Friday’s Letters

Dear NF, you love walking up and down those apartment stairs dontcha?!

Dear Smellen, glad you read this thing and you care when I don’t post.

Dear Janman, excited to see you this Sunday… and that you get to experience what life is like with a toddler and NFL football.

Dear NFL Football, go easy on me this year… I don’t want to dread you.  Make it about fun, food, friends, family… not screaming at the tv the entire day… thank you.

Dear Pumpkin flavored anything, I haven’t had any of you yet… I refuse in August… but it’s September now… MAYBe it’s okay… but if I drink you, that means Summer if officially over… I think.

Dear C, keep on being good to me!

Dear wine tour tomorrow, Pah-lease do not get me too drunk.  I think since I was pregnant I am unable to drink and enjoy it.  I hopefully will enjoy this, sans baby boy.  And don’t make me ridiculously tired either.

Dear pedicure I had Thursday, I didn’t want to spend the $ but I am SO glad I did.  I’ve been doin them myself for a year now… and seriously every now and again you gotta get a good one.  Also, I had them do a dark purple (yeah I googled fall 2013 colors so what)… and I typically am not so great at painting the dark dark colors… so having a professional do it… perfect!

Dear Sushi I had Thursday, AMAZING following to my pedicure… loved you!

Dear Candy Crush, STOP taking OVER my 9-11 PMs!!!!  This is my cleaning, reading, relaxing time… I play candy crush, and request more lives, and wait for another life, and before I know it I wasted two freaking HOURS!  Whattt.

Dear Big Brother, Why’d you have to have a double eviction?  You totally ruined my Amanda being out celebration by immediately sending Elissa out too.  BOOO!  500th episode of Big Brother did not go the way I wanted it to.

Dear new season of TV, I’m not ready for you yet!!  Usually I’m dying for new TV to be on… but right now I just feel so overwhelmed!  What do I watch!  How do I keep up with it all!?

Dear new workout routine I added, love you!  You’re making me sore in all new ways!

Dear Lamar Odom, so TMZ said you went to a sushi place, had miso soup and 2 green teas but no sushi.. your bill was $7 but you left a $20…… WHAT?!  Why do I need to know this… and why did I remember every detail of the article I read.  TMZ you stalk Lamar’s LIFE …anndd I guess that means I do too?  Sorry Lamar, have your miso soup in peace.  And I hope you get off crack or was never even on it… truthfully I mean it.

Dear Pretty Little Liars, I thought I needed a break from you… but I didn’t…. I want you backkk!!

So what Wednesday…

Today I am saying So What If….

– the combination of the weather changing and gaining a few lbs over labor day weekend caused me to try on at least 5 different outfits this morning because everything felt uncomfortable.

– I bought two more pairs of crop black yoga pants… and now I own 7 pairs (one for everyday of the week!)

– every time I go to the mall I look at sports bras wanting more… and then see the price and say DANGGG (I never say dang?) $30 for a dri fit nike sports bra… and I already own like 7 of these things… I spent like $200 on sports bras?!  WHAT…. and I walk away… knowing i will do the same thing a few weeks later when I return.

 <— simply the best… for a price.

– I 100% am boycotting Miley.  Her song comes on, her song goes OFF.  I turn that ish off asap.  Because 1, I am so sick of it.  2, I imagine her at the vmas and I throw up.  Miley, you’re done.

(I will not even post a photo of it, because yeah, we’ve all seen it way too much).

– I can’t freakin WAIT for Big Brother to be on tonight… Mccranda will finally endddd!!!  Ahhhhh Mccrandaaaa.

– I am going through Pretty Little Liar withdrawals already?

– I stopped reading at night because Candy Crush has taken over my reading time at night.

Thursday Thoughts

WHO will go home tonight on BIG BROTHER 15!!??  And why do I care so much…?  It’s Howard, Candice, or Amanda.  Aaryn picked Howard and Spencer to go up – then Spencer won veto, and Aaryn replaced him with Candice.  American is MVP and put Amanda up.  The house still doesn’t know America is MVP.  WHHHAT!  So I think it’s going to be Howard.

I asked C who he thinks will go home after recapping him…. he said Amanda cause she didn’t wear a two piece for Mccrae’s birthday.  HA. It’s going to be Howard though… Helen’s in control.

I am not having ANY fried food starting July 22nd – August 22nd.  Why?  Because THE NY STATE FAIR starts August 22nd and I’d like some fried dough, maybe a bloomin onion, maybe some more fair food…. and if I take an entire month OFF from fried food I think I will feel okay about it.  So far it’s been really easy… it’s been 11 days and all I’ve had to do is turn down an offering of a single fast food hashbrown once.  I guess I don’t really have a problem with it.  Chocolate on the other hand…

AHHH I’m late… I know Candy Crush was all the rage months ago… but I’ve finally discovered it.  THANKS for wasting an hour of my night the past 4 nights.  I even played another game up until level 8 to get more candy crush lives…. that’s insane!  What’s REALLY insane is paying for lives… I will NEV-ERR do that… if I do send me to candy crush rehab asap.